What About YOUR Friends?

Good Morning Everyone!

I really thought I would be able to post yesterday but the day really got away from me.. I had an eye appointment and made another appointment in two weeks to go back to be dilated.. Uh-oh!

.... I afraid.. I real afraid..

Anyhow, today's topic is something that has been on my mind for QUITE some time.. It's catered to the ladies, since it is what I experience it as, but I am sure my male followers will have some insight or agree with a few points in this post..

People, why do we feel the need to compete with one another??? Honestly, as black people we should be able to band together and not compete with one another on EVERYTHING..

Last Thursday, I went to a Kappa After Work Engagement called Kocktails and Kufflinks *insert side eye for their love of K* Since I don't know many people, I went by myself since I was told at the last minute and decided to venture out at the last minute.

When I got there, it took me about 15 minutes to drive around looking for parking that wouldn't rip me off. I finally found a garage that was connected to the hotel that was reasonable. Since it has started raining, I was glad that I had an umbrella and this place connected to the hotel.

Anyhow, when I got off of the elevator, there were no signs pointing to the bridge or walkway and I saw an older white man who asked me was I lost. I nodded my head and asked could he point me in the direction of the Renaissance Hotel. He pointed and said, "Go through those double glass doors, walk up the four stairs and turn to your right and you're in the lounge." I said thanks and hurried off.

Once I walked in, I was not greeted by anyone and didn't see any signs, so I walked past a few empty tables and saw two ladies sitting by themselves. I went up to them and asked "Are you guys here for the Kappa social? Or is that contained to the bar area?" One of them turned to me and smiled and mouthed a "hi." But the other one, smdh, she looked at me down up and down again, flipped her dry weave and said, "Yes, you can sit anywhere, but these seats are for my boo's when I find 'em." Then, she gave me a fake smile.

I mean, I wasn't trying to sit with her, so I said a quick "Thanks" and kept it moving right on to the bar.

What made the girl, whom I shall refer to as "Dry Weave" or "DW" for short, be so curt and short with me??

Competition!!

She saw me as competition, when I saw her as an ally, which is a situation I always seem to find myself in.

Honestly, no, she was not my friend, I had never seen either of them a day in my life, but you don't see men (real men anyway) act that way with each other.

Even though she did not know me, as a woman, she could have at least been cordial. The jealousy and competitive nature was written all across DW's face. She stated that she was "saving seats for her potential boo's!!"

C'MON SON!

I don't understand why we as black women view each other as competition in unnecessary situations like the one I found myself to be in. If I am dressed cute, giving another chick a compliment does NOTHING to take away from my fly-osity.. It's a sign of maturity and being secure in which I can acknowledge somebody else for doing, wearing or saying something that is "alright with me." I "gives" props when props are in order to be given. It's a sign of immaturity and insecurity in which you can not give a simple compliment that is genuine.

If the roles were reversed, and I was there with my friend and a friendly-looking girl came up to us asking questions, I would have asked questions, like are you new to town? Did you come alone? Something to effect to show I was trying to be friendly and warm, extending an olive branch and being nice to somebody you don't know. If she would have reciprocated my niceness, I would have offered her a seat or offered to relocate to the bar with her just to kick back and people watch. IDK what to say, maybe I have an outgoing personality (maybe?!), but I do have a warm, inviting aura and I am a nice person. I like to help out whenever I can and I am naturally friendly until I have reason to not be friendly. I'm a social person and I like to make sure people are having fun.

If she would have offered me a seat, it definitely would have been begrudgingly and I would not have taken it, because no one wants to feel like a charity case. And charity case, I am not! lol Why are girls not nice to each other? Why are guys more nice to guys or girls? Crabs in a barrel.... I tell ya..

I mean, I can't see a guy sitting there with his other guy friend and another guy coming up to him asking was this the venue and the guy being all *insert deep dumb dude voice* "yea, but don't sit here because you're flyer than me and I don't want these freaks to find out....ha ha ha ha" lol lol Sorry, but thats how some guys talk..

To let you know how my night went, I ended up sitting at the bar, meeting 4 Alphas, whom were really cool and we chatted it up all night and casually kicked it, while DW and her sidekick sat on the outskirts of the event being viewed as outcasts and were avoided by the men all night.. I win!! Boo-fricking-hoo.. That's Karma boo-boo! *PLUNK*

What do you think? Am I wrong to view every woman as my ally? Is better for women to compete? Are all men this way too?

Until next time, folks....!